Tales of the WAGs

16 Feb
In case you don’t know who this is – her name is Haley Bracken and she’s married to an Australian cricketer.  So – in other words, she’s a WAG.  It’s such an unfortunate title (always makes me think of puppy dogs) but now seems the standard way of referring to the wives and girlfriends of sports stars.  Anyway, last night was a big awards ceremony for Australian cricketers – hence the red carpet (which now gets more coverage than the awards).  Haley’s dress caused the biggest interest stir, for obvious reasons.  I was watching the Today show this morning and Haley appeared, talking about the now infamous dress.  She said “It is daring, but everything’s covered”. 

Hmmm… everything?  I can definitely see breasts, and a belly button – so not EVERYTHING is covered (in fact, barely anything is covered).  Haley went on “I went with the trend of the nude look and lace on it. I think that’s the trend at the moment – so I went with it.”  Haley’s right.  Nude is in – but that’s nude as in the colour nude (pinky beige) not actually being naked.  Yes – lace is in too.  But nude lace amounts to basically wearing glad wrap. It probably won’t surprise you to discover that Haley designed the dress herself.  Bingo!  First mistake. Dress designing is an art.  It’s not for the part timers.  It also won’t surprise you to know that Haley is planning to wear the dress again when she enters the Mrs World Australia.  It does look like a pageant dress – and pageant hair – and underneath that dress there are pageant shoes.  I saw them on TV.  They had clear plastic platforms.  Kind of reminded me of jelly sandals.  Haley finished her interview by saying “I wanted to look like the ocean and the rainforest”.  Gosh – that’s a big call.  Usually, when I get dressed I want to look presentable and stylish.  I’ve never thought about aiming to look like an entire element of nature.  What’s next?  Looking like the mountains (boobs essential)?  Or the plains (for the flat chested)?
Now – I know that all of the above sounds incredibly nasty.  I don’t mean it to be.  On the up side – I think Haley has a gorgeous face, and a figure to die for (although the pertness of the boobs make me think plastic is involved).  I just have a problem with the frock.

To prove I’m not a nark, I also want to say how gorgeous I thought Lee Furlong and Lara Bingle looked.  Sure, they are genetically blessed but I thought Lee Furlong stood out for the elegant simplicity of the dress. It does border a little bit on Morticia Adams – and you could argue that black velvet (I think that’s what it is) is a bit heavy for summer in Australia.  But the back drags it from gothic disaster to sexy-but-elegant.  Just shows that you don’t have to show a lot of skin to be sexy.  I love the messy updo and the make-up just makes her look radiant.

Lara Bingle might be from the Shire – but the girl’s got style (or a good stylist).  Lara seems to love a plunging front – but when you have the natural assets – why not? Again, I love the simplicity of the gown.  It’s white – but not bridal.  The draping makes around the decolletage makes it current.  I would have loved to see how it looked with the train extended on the ground but I can understand – white gown dragging on floor is a recipe for stains.  I’m not sure the photo does her justice.  She just looked luminous on the television footage.  I have to admit – I also love the fake Chanel tattoos on her neck.  Sure, they’re a little gimmicky.  But it’s something new and cool.  I also love the idea of Chanel doing fake tattoos – tradtionally the domain of 5 year olds.  I don’t think I’ll be wearing them to the shops anytime soon – but the red carpet is the place to try something different, but not too different.  Haley Bracken take note.

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