Pregnant in heels

12 Jun
Rosie Pope – pregnant and in heels!

If you’ve ever been pregnant, you’ll remember that point towards the end when you’re as big as a whale and you think to yourself ‘What I really need right now is a portrait of myself, naked, astride a horse to give to my husband as a gift to celebrate this wondrous event.’ Remember that moment? Do you? Do you? No you don’t? Neither do I. But apparently, there are women out there who do have that moment. One such woman is featured in an American reality series called ‘Pregnant in Heels’. It’s about a maternity concierge called Rosie Pope who has the world’s weirdest speaking voice (click here for a demo). It’s one of those annoying hybrid American/British accents mixed with a speech impediment. I hear you asking ‘What the hell is a maternity concierge?’ Well, just as a hotel concierge is meant to cater to a guest’s every whim, the maternity concierge caters to a pregnant woman’s every whim, including the aforementioned pregnant woman’s desire for a painting of her, pregnant, nude and on a horse. Even Rosie blinked at that one. But inappropriate requests are part of the job.
 Rosie does everything from tell parents-to-be what to name their baby (Bowen was her pick) to finding a British royal to be Godparent to another couple’s child (she recruited Lord Wedgewood) to overhauling another couple’s nursery with a rock and roll theme. It’s outsourcing on steroids. When Rosie’s not attending to her clients’ very bizarre (and no doubt hormone-driven) requests, she also runs a maternity clothing label and offers parenting and pre-natal classes. Her rationale is that many modern parents don’t have the support network of extended family that used to exist – the lack of a Nanna, she calls it – and that’s the void that Rosie is filling, the Nanna-void. But I’m not buying it. No Nanna that I’ve ever met would organise a $5000 couture gown for their daughter to wear while giving birth. Rosie did. FYI – the woman had a caeserean and popped the frock on as soon as the stitching was finished, the stitching on her – not the dress. To be frank, I’m constantly amazed as just how many grandparents do provide childcare for their grandchildren while their daughters and daughters-in-law go back to work. You’ll often find more seniors hanging out in a kid’s playground than you would at the local bingo club. Yes – I know that every woman is not lucky enough to have the support of extended family but I don’t think a woman like Rosie is the answer. What bugs me about her is that I think the service she offers really justs exploits a woman’s insecurities at a time when she’s feeling most vulnerable; when she’s physically bigger than usual and facing the extremely daunting task of squeezing a watermelon out of a pinhole, and then having the job of being almost solely responsible for another human being’s survival. I think the title of the show says it all. ‘Pregnant in heels’. It’s not enough to be pregnant these days, you’ve got to do it in style, you’ve got to do it perfectly. And that’s the illusion that Rosie is selling. That you can pay someone else to help you to have the perfect birth and be the perfect parent. As every parent knows. It doesn’t work like that. Childbirth is inevitably painful and messy. It’s not the place for couture gowns. As for parenting, it’s a constant work in progress. Sometimes you get it right, sometimes you get it wrong – but don’t fall into the trap of thinking a stranger like Rosie has all the answers. She’ll never know your baby like you do. Don’t feel that you have to be ‘pregnant in heel’s’ – do it flats, thongs, barefoot – whatever you like. It’s not a contest.


One Response to “Pregnant in heels”

  1. Anonymous June 13, 2011 at 8:53 am #

    you need a lot of fertiliser to be able to smell the rosie'sshe is in full bloom.

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